Porn is everywhere. Research from the Australian eSafety Commissioner has found that the vast majority of Australian adults have encountered online porn at some point, and that for young people, exposure often happens long before any meaningful conversation about sex, pleasure or consent has taken place. The eSafety Commissioner's research on young people's experiences with online pornography suggests that most young Australians have seen porn by their mid-teens, with a significant proportion having their first exposure around age 13 or earlier — often accidentally.

And here's the thing I want to say upfront: porn isn't always "bad". Just like a vibrator, a fantasy, or a great lube, porn is an erotic tool. And like any tool, it can be used in a healthy, pleasurable, enriching way — or in a way that quietly starts to work against us.

When porn isn't being used as a replacement for proper sex education, it can be wonderful. It can help us discover new ideas, open up fantasies and kinks we didn't know we had, give us permission to explore, and spark curiosity. It can be enjoyed alone, and it can be enjoyed together as a couple.

But there's also a darker side to mainstream internet porn — one worth being really honest about.

Some research suggests that how and what we consume matters. Traditional porn may impact our confidence, our relationships, our sexual function, and even the way our brain responds to arousal. On top of that, much of the "free to access" porn out there isn't produced ethically — meaning the performers may not have been treated well, paid fairly, or given true agency over the content being made.

So I've pulled together this worksheet as a starting point: not to shame anyone's porn use, but to give you the information to make conscious, informed choices about what you're consuming and why.

In this worksheet:

• The potential negative impacts of traditional porn
• What "ethical porn" actually means
• What to look out for when finding ethical porn
• Resources to check out
• Talking to your partner about porn (privacy vs secrecy, boundaries, and how to have the conversation)
• A note on mindful masturbation

Take what resonates. Leave what doesn't.